“Help me to journey beyond the familiar and into the unknown.
—A prayer inspired by St. Brendan of Clonfert
Give me the faith to leave old ways and break fresh ground with You.
Christ of the mysteries, I trust You to be stronger than each storm within me.
I will trust in the darkness and know that my times, even now, are in Your hand.
Tune my spirit to the music of heaven and make my obedience count for You.
Amen.”
This was the perfect prayer for me today. As most of you know, I don’t deal well with places that are remote or rugged. And today we had one goal: to visit Sequoia National Park. And so today was the most challenging day yet for me. I really wanted to do this because it meant so much to John. And he has been wonderful about taking me to cathedrals and missions and shrines. But I knew it would be very uncomfortable for me.
I also wanted to go into the park because I knew it would be uncomfortable. I am on a pilgrimage. I am seeking to be transformed by God. In order for this to happen, sometimes I need to go where things are not so comfortable. I need to jolt myself out of the way so that God can work. “The only way to widen our threshold of tolerance,” writes Christine Valters Paintner, “is to dance at its edges, explore uncomfortable places, and stay present. When we risk the unfamiliar, our resiliency grows and we become more capable of living life…Stability demands that we stay with difficult experiences and stay present to the discomfort they create in us.”
And so we went into the park. It took about two hours of driving time once we entered the park just to come out on the other side. There was no cell phone service, and the roads were steep and curvy with no guard rails. We climbed to well over 7,000 feet elevation, and I found it was sometimes a challenge to catch my breath.
I found that I was not nearly as nervous as I had anticipated, but I was still most definitely uncomfortable. John was reveling in the incredible views, and I was just trying to be a good sport.
About half way through the park, John wanted to stop and do the short hike to General Sherman, the largest tree in the park. Even on easy terrain, I would likely have chosen to wait in the car. But we were at 7,000 feet and the trail, though short, was steep. So John went, and I waited.
While he was gone, I was praying, wrestling with guilt over not being able to enjoy the astounding natural beauty the way he was. And then it was as though the Spirit whispered soothing words to my soul. There are different kinds of beauty, He seemed to say. For John, the beauty lay in the natural surroundings. For me, the beauty lay in being able to face some of my deepest fears and emerge whole.
Tonight I am celebrating quietly in our hotel room. It is so good to be alive in this world the Father has crafted! Lead me on Your path, O Lord!
One of my favorite moments of the day! 🙂 
