Alleluia! The Lord is risen!
“Easter is never deserved,” wrote Jan Karon. Today I am feeling this sentiment keenly. The blessings that have been poured out upon my life are already wonderful beyond imagining. It is so easy, though, not to notice. And then…Easter!
All the blessings of this life pale in comparison to all that Easter makes possible for all eternity. All of this life is only a foretaste, a teaser, of all of eternity. Or at least of what eternity can be. And I move through most of this life with blinders on, with my senses dulled. And then…Easter!!
From time to time I wonder about why I am satisfied with so little, and then, in the same breath, I grumble. Jesus does ask for everything, it is true. But He gives more than any “everything” I can even begin to imagine in return. Why is my desire, and my gratitude, so lukewarm? It is my usual state of being. And then…Easter!!!
”It would seem that Our Lord finds our desires not too strong, but too weak,” said C.S. Lewis. “We are half-hearted creatures, fooling about with drink and sex and ambition when infinite joy is offered us, like an ignorant child who wants to go on making mud pies in a slum because he cannot imagine what is meant by the offer of a holiday at the sea. We are far too easily pleased.”
Easter challenges my desires. Do I really want all that Easter promises? Do I really want it all? The answer, of course, is YES!!! What Easter makes possible is that for which I was made. I just don’t always realize it.
This morning John and I returned to Holy Trinity Monastery for Easter Mass. The congregation was made up mostly of older people, retirees who live in RVs and spend a few months at a time living at the monastery and keeping it running. The service was not polished, but it was heartfelt. The elderly priest, Fr. Ray, conducted the Mass in a slow, deliberate fashion that gave plenty of time for reflection.
It was such a blessing to visit this special place not once but twice in the span of just a few days. I found myself greedy for more. I was disappointed when I had to leave this place. The likelihood is that I will not be back. I had to take myself firmly in hand and remind myself not to let the joy of the blessing be stolen away by greed for more. How often do I do this? The “more” for which I yearn is right at hand. And I can so easily miss it by not entering fully into the present moment.
Easter lunch was prepared for us by John’s cousin Angi. She spread a beautiful table under the huge mesquite tree in Aunt Diana’s back yard. The food, of course, was fabulous. But the real treat was being with these dear people we haven’t seen in so many years and may never see again this side of heaven.
We dispersed around mid-afternoon. Angi and Mike to make the long drive north to Mesa, AZ. Diana to take a nap. And John and I to begin packing the car. But then came evening.
John and I returned to have one last visit with Aunt Diana and her son Chris. This time it was a quiet, gentle conversation about matters of faith and eternity. Aunt Diana shared with us the story of her conversion. Chris, who is normally so quiet, joined right in. And then Aunt Diana gifted me with a whole box of books, mostly saints’ lives and works of the Church Fathers. This evening truly was a sacred time.
Aunt Diana is weak, and apparently getting weaker quite rapidly. It is hard to see her fading away. But it is Easter! And Easter is not for one day only. We, if we are willing, live an eternal Easter. “Do not abandon yourselves to despair,” said Pope Saint John Paul II. “We are the Easter people and hallelujah is our song.”
The Lord is risen indeed! Alleluia!